So Long Grandma Review
Novelty games are a dime a dozen on the Steam marketplace, and Pixidraft Studios’ So Long Grandma is no exception. Though it may feature a morbid and absolutely scandalous premise, is it at the very least a coherent game?
So Long Grandma Review
So Long Grandma starts things off with a seemingly touching tale. Your grandma has seven days to live, and one of the items on her bucket list is to see the ocean. However, in order to get the funds necessary, you must do what you need to do, and fling her into some coins from the top of her balcony. It makes absolutely no sense, and is truly tasteless.
Each of the seven days is broken down further into 18 rounds, with the ultimate goal to earn $3600. Players can earn $200 a day in $10 coin increments, with the goal to fling grandma around until every coin is gathered.
There’s just one thing – depth perception is completely and utterly shot. Due to the low poly look of the game, the awful physics engine, and the terrible lighting, it can be hard to see exactly where you are aiming. As a result, it can be easy to miss coins, forcing players to wait and try again. This title is truly an exercise in patience, and no amount of practice will help you prepare for how poorly designed the mechanics are.
Players can somewhat ease the burden with power-ups that are intermittently offered in the kitchen. Offering perks like cooldowns, they make things somewhat easier, but are simply a child-sized band-aid on a festering wound.
There are some parts of So Long Grandma that have players jumping on your PC to play a number of minigames. In these games, players must control a ball and pick up coins in the virtual world. There is no context to these areas either – one may be in a prison yard, while another is in a bowling alley. The depth perception is shot in these titles too – this is made that much worse when trying to make the ball hover, and it is hard to line things up.
To make matters worse, police officers can force you to start things over if you are not careful. If grandma gets hit by an officer’s vehicle, you’ll end up getting busted. This was absolutely unnecessary, and makes the game that much harder.
So Long Grandma is a broken game with an absolutely horrible premise. This is yet another ironic Steam game that decides to push the envelope in lieu of good gameplay or any semblance of taste.
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