Timmy’s Cooking Show Review – Bloody Dreadful
Part cooking show, part FMV title, BMC Studios takes players to the kitchen with their new title Timmy’s Cooking Show. The concept is sound, but there’s just one problem: Timmy can’t cook.
Timmy’s Cooking Show Review
Following up on their previous title, the found footage disaster Unsubscribed: The Game, Tmmy’s Cooking Show kicks things off with a VOIP call over “Skloopy” and an apology. Steve is in some hot water over the fake Russian accent he did in the previous game, but his confession falls on deaf ears as Timmy attempts to plug the second episode of his cooking show. Choosing to watch his latest creation, the game finally gets underway.
That is, if you can call it a game. Essentially serving as an episode of a TV show, players will be watching far more than they are playing. After putting on his chef’s hat, Timmy hits the ground running, showing players how to make soup, a cake, pizza, mac and cheese, and other lazy dishes.
One would expect to learn a thing or two about food preparation, but the ingredients on hand simply aren’t up to the task. It starts out horribly from the get-go, where he says that “water is for p*ssies” when making soup and substitutes in store brand 7-Up instead. It gets far worse from there; canned hot dogs in soup, chocolate bars and pureed carrots on pizza, pepperoni in cakes, and spaghetti with soda are just a few of the obscenities Timmy concocts in his kitchen.
The stuff he makes is absolutely diabolical, and will no doubt trigger the gag reflex of all those watching. If that is not enough, players will finally watch Timmy eat his creations at the end of the title. One can see him struggling to not throw up throughout its runtime; it makes you wonder why he is subjecting both himself and the player to this torture.
He does try to make an attempt to entertain the player though. When he spills soda on his shirt, he takes it off to give players a new perspective. In addition, little text bubbles like “oof oof” also appear, though there is no context to these moments. The cameraman makes an admirable attempt to zoom in on certain objects, but it proves to be out of focus and disorienting every time it is attempted.
It’s a shame none of these work too, as Timmy’s Cooking Show is in real time. For those looking for jump cuts or something to break up the monotony, they’re out of luck; most segments are a continuous single take. This leads to stuttering and a heaping helping of repetition. Players will know the excruciating wait it takes for a cake to cook in real time once all is said and done here. To add insult to injury, the title runs for a little more than two hours – slightly longer than the alloted time Steam allows players to claim a refund.
Not all is lost though; there is some brief gameplay to be found. In a handful of moments in the title, players will be able to make a choice. None of these require too much insight – it more or less devolves into how Timmy is avoiding getting sued – but even the most nonsensical break is an absolute godsend in a title like this. It’s just a shame that this is the only choice players are given; it could have just as well served as a YouTube video as opposed to a Steam release.
All those hoping to get a taste of Timmy’s Cooking Show will leave with a bad taste in their mouth. The food is bad, the pacing is poor, and the gameplay is nonexistent.
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